What's love got to do with it?

This time last April, Leonard and I were busy preparing for life in an RV. Thinking back on it all – our stay in blizzard-stricken South Dakota to get our drivers' licenses, going to Texas to pick up a tow vehicle, driving to Arkansas to take possession of the 5^th wheel – everything seems a blur. Settling in for another visit with family and friends in Topeka affords me an opportunity to reflect on our first year as full-timers. As I do, one aspect of the lifestyle that strikes me most is that retiring together was one thing; retiring together in less than 400 square feet of space has been quite another matter entirely. In fact, it can give the phrase “getting on my nerves” a whole new meaning!

There are times when bad weather or other factors force us into what seems more like a state of imprisonment than one of blissful togetherness. The 15^th do-si-do around the kitchen island because one of you is using the stove while the other needs to get from living room to laundry or another turn waiting for your roommate to finish tying his shoes so you can get to the bathroom can make one a tad testy. Oh good! You're still here quickly becomes Oh, god! You're still here! It amazes me that the news isn't flooded with reports about campground violence. (“Violence strikes RV campground. Wife bludgeons husband with hitch ball. News at 10.”)
 

For me, enduring these relationship trials has more to do with liking the other person than with loving them. Of course, it doesn't hurt to have a few meaningful distractions handy for those times when even liking someone isn't enough.

The ukulele fits perfectly with our small space lifestyle.

Volunteering provides considerable relief in this regard. Even when Leonard and I share the same work schedule, which is to say whenever we volunteer, we find ways to spend quality time apart. For example, while he assists a visitor with planning their hike, I talk with someone else who wants to know about the local wildlife. Or, we take separate lunch breaks. Or, one checks the grounds while the other staffs the building. (You get the picture.)
 



Need time for yourself? Just grab your wheels and head for

the nearest bike trail.

Hobbies help, too, though I periodically must remind myself that sitting in a corner glaring at my spouse and making a mental list of his character defects does not constitute a “hobby.” Here, as with anything RV-related, size matters. When we decided to learn to play a musical instrument, spatial limitations of the rig ruled out the cello and tuba as options. (Also, we didn't want to risk being chased out of a campground by our non-tuba loving neighbors.) We elected instead to take up the ukulele, which, in addition to being compact for easy storage produces a sound pleasant enough to appease even the most finicky music aficionado. Leonard uses the living room for practice; I move to the bedroom. Easy.
 

Exercise serves as a great release. Those of you who know me know that athletics has never been my strong suit. (It took me two weeks of rolling about the sofa cushions on the living room floor to teach myself how to do a cartwheel so I could pass the gymnastics unit in junior high gym class.) That said, sticking with a regular fitness routine - in our case cardio plus strength training – ranks high on my list of priorities. It keeps my stress level in check and gives me another option for finding time apart. (One walks while the other uses the weight set and vice versa.)
 



I recently rediscovered knitting, something my grandmother

taught me. It requires little storage space and produces useful

items. This dish rag I made (above) was so popular I got a

request for another!

Then, there's always the old, “I'm going out for awhile” trick. No need for making excuses about the dog needing a walk. Just put one foot in front of the other and go! By the time we reach this stage, we are both usually ready to part company for a bit so there are no hurt feelings.
 

When the above coping mechanisms fail, I still have one last arrow in my RV togetherness survival quiver: gratitude. I remind myself how fortunate I am to be retired years before I planned to do so, how wonderful it is that I get to live in so many terrific places, and how special it is to be able to share my experiences with someone I both love and like. I guess I'll try to stand it all for another year...if you insist.

Reading always makes for a good escape. E-readers provide

the perfect opportunity to store an ample library in your hand.

This modest collection of games comes in handy on a rainy day. Some can be

played solo. All fit in the small storage space of this dining room chair.